early early am

Yeah, yeah, I know I should give myself a break, but I HAVE been giving myself a break and it's time to crack the whip now. I can't afford new clothes and I look terrible in the ones I own. I can't afford the gym, but more importantly - i have no time for the gym - I have already stretched our free babysitting sooooo far, I couldn't possibly ask my mom to do anymore. Jeff gave me a gift certificate for a yoga place on Mother's day and I check their schedule to see if there are any classes that would work, because they DO offer mom and child classes - but either I have to go to/be at preschool or I am at work when they offer the classes that I would like to take. I need to simply kick myself in the butt and exercise at home! And I need to start taking more walks with the kids. I got Stella to be a great crib napper but her schedule breaks up our day so that it's hard to get outside much... that sounds pathetic.
Our day
kids wake up anywhere from 5:30 - 7
turn on npr to pretend I still know about current events and because I like the sound of adult voices
spend the next hour and a half multi tasking: teeth brushing, feeding stella, breakfast for sophia, breakfast for me, coffee for me, dressing each kid (i.e. wrestling each kid), think about shower. Intersperse with reprimands of "don't hit your sister" to each of them (Stella has discovered her spunk)
throw in there chores of dishes/clean kitchen and laundry as well
then the next hour is me trying to play/read with them but also plan/prep/make any upcoming meals
then at about 9 stella starts her first nap
while stella naps I try to keep sophia amused but quiet - downstairs time: a little sesame street or art time
then when stella wakes it's about 11. we nurse and then I try to get lunch into sophia and stella. by the time all that is done it's usually 1 and stella starts her afternoon nap around 2 so I feel like we can't go out! this is especially hard now that she;s in the big-baby carseat which doesn't leave the car. she wakes RIGHT up if you try to move her from the carseat so if she falls asleep in the car then I either have to stay there with her or she has a TINY nap.

Maybe I can push back lunch and take them for a walk at 11:30, or go to a placespace. That way if it is a day that I go to work then we at least can be home by 1 and if need be my mom can feed them lunch. I'm not sure this would work for Stella, but I could also have a healthy snack for sophia during that time...

anyway, it's just amazing how the day slips away and I feel like I haven't done anything and no one seems particularly happy. sigh

I wish sophia still napped. I know i should be requiring "quiet time" but since they share a room it's nearly impossible.

I am trying harder to have a better handle on menus/meals etc. With the cracking of the whip I am trying very very hard to eat better - at least more salads/vegetables and less bread.

Anyone have suggestions for first fingerfoods for Stella? She loves to feed herself and I feel like she also ends up eating too much "bread" (cheerios, graham crackers, biter biscuits, bits of bread)> She's had banana and pear and potato. I am going to try canned green beans and canned peas next - you know how they get so mushy in the can...